Funny online dating statuses or status
For 90 % of the people who will read the status, it doesn’t come near the red territory, which is all they care about. The other possible explanation is severe narcissism, as if somehow, because you’re you, even the smallest details of your life are interesting to others.
I’m going about my afternoon pleasantly, when I open my email and a friend has forwarded me what she calls a particularly heinous Facebook status from her news feed, written by someone we’ll call Daniel. I left my amazing job at NBC to move back to Chicago. I started yoga (thanks Jake Fisher & Jonah Perlstein! This process slots the author into one of four sub-categories: Core reasons for posting: Loneliness; Narcissism; Thinking a status update is supposed to be an actual status update Allow me to present a visual— “Finally finished my paper! Finishing your paper is green territory on the above chart, or if you had been working on it for a couple months, it might scrape the outer edges of the orange. I suppose it’s nice that Facebook gives a lonely person someone to tell their day to, and if these statuses didn’t come with the byproduct of reminding everyone else that life is meaningless and they’re gonna die someday, they wouldn’t have to be on this list.
This includes all humblebrags, indirect brags, brags disguised as a rant, etc.
Drank the best orange juice I’ve ever had with Davey Welch. Description: Like the blatant brags above except behind a frail disguise.
My grandmother aside, there is no good reason to ever do this. There are lots of very annoying reasons to do this.
Let’s list them: The one possibility I enjoy is that the message is written to be jealousy-inducing specifically for one individual who will likely be seeing it, whether it be an ex or a friend they hate.
But instead of distancing myself from the horror, I soaked in it.
It was everything bad about everything, all at once.
The author and the author’s life are interesting in and of themselves. So the person is essentially spreading their sadness, and that’s a shitty thing to do, so it’s on the list.A weird part of the life of a major celebrity is that people are obsessed with everything about them, even their blue territory.If you’re not a major celebrity, this is not a problem you have, I promise. It made me think about what makes terrible Facebook behavior terrible, and why other Facebook behavior isn’t annoying at all. I read it again and again, fascinated by how something could be so aggressively unappealing.